Sunday, January 19, 2014

The Struggle for So Called "Perfection"

I recent read a tweet about only posting the "perfect" pics/experiences/events on social media. She said we are not only lying to others but to ourselves about our lives. I've written here before that I choose to live and surround mysf with positive thoughts and people, and I have to say this tweet kind of rubbed me wrong. Yet as I think about it I'm absolutely presenting a false image of myself and my family. No, I'm absolutely not perfect. I'm not ashamed of the not so great things that happen. It's life. I just don't like to make a big production of them. I prefer to celebrate the successes than to dwell on the failures. Yes, I reflect on the things that don't go well. Obsess may be more accurate in fact. I'm my own worst critic and often an enemy.  My boss finds that a positive quality; I'm not so sure. Living in a stressful little microcosm is not always the most pleasant spot to be. There are times I can sabatage myself and goals quicker than a 2 year with a box of crayons crayon and a white wall. 

But here's the thing: what does it accomplish to out all my failures out there? I share some, just like I share some of my successes. I don't share all of every aspect of my life. I'm not fishing for components. I'm not looking for pity. Encouragement is nice after a setback, but I'm not emotionally needy or seeking that attention either. I'm just a Hoosier girl sharing with whomever cares to listen. Maybe that's proof I'm needy. Maybe I am. I like to write. I like to sew. I like to learn and teach. I like to be fit and take care of myself and my family. It's scarey to put my life out there for others. I struggle with how much to disclose. My ultimate goal is to help or inspire someone else to learn something then I have succeeded. Should I be more real? I don't feel like I'm sugar coating. I'm just me. Alison. Country girl. Basketball fan. Trying to tackle new goals, break out of my comfort zone a little and try some new things. And from now on, a little more real with my audience about the trials and tribulations of life.  Welcome to the journey. I hope you'll travel with me. 


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